Good Day Everyone,
Given that I have spent most of my adult life travelling
both within the UK and overseas, you’d think I’d be used to it by now… but oh
no. I still get really bad bouts of anxiety a few days before I’m due to
travel. My anxiety is definitely worse if I’m not travelling by car. You see,
despite flying regularly when I was a career woman, I have a big fear of
flying. A fear that is only surpassed by my fear of travelling by sea which I
have very rarely done. Being a naturally anxious person, with worrying tendencies
only exceed by my own mother’s, I tend to get myself or rather my stomach into
knots quite regularly.
I have many fears, I can’t help it, it’s just the way I am!
Although I’m convinced there is a hereditary component as many of my fears are
shared by my mother. I’m scared of heights hence flying, water to the extent
that I still can’t swim and avoid baths, creepy crawlies, the dark, and even
people. I say people because I have a rather nervous and jumpy disposition.
There were many occasions at work where I’d be so engrossed in what I was
working on that if a colleague called my name or tapped me on the shoulder, a
loud shriek would automatically let itself out of my mouth before my brain even
had the chance to process that there was, in fact, nothing to be scared of.
Back home in England when we lived in a house, if I was
upstairs and my hubby was downstairs he would have to shout
from the bottom of the stairs that he was coming up because I just had way too
many occasions of being scared half to death by his sudden appearance. I think
the fact that I am easily engrossed in whatever I’m doing, be it listening to
music, watching a movie, working or even just sat there thinking / day dreaming,
makes my nervous disposition worse because my mind is rarely in the present.
I’m always miles away so any sudden sound or movement that brings me back to Earth
has quite a dramatic effect! My knee jerk reaction is to shriek and this
reaction is always faster than my brain being able to process that there is no
danger. Its OK... you can laugh... go ahead... most of my family and friends do ;o).
Anyway, back to the travelling anxiety. I don’t have a fear
of travelling per se. On the contrary, I love travelling to new places, meeting
new people and seeing new and exciting things. Being away from the comforts and
familiarity of my own home doesn’t worry me in the least. I feel incredibly
blessed to have had a career that allowed me to see many different and
wonderful places around Europe, the Nordics and the US. I don’t even mind
traveling alone to unfamiliar places. I wouldn’t have been able to have the
career that I did, if that was the case. I regularly travelled to cities that
I’d never been to before, all by myself, often unable to speak the language. So
long as I have my phone, my passport and some money / credit cards so that I can
keep in touch with people and get myself on a flight back home in an emergency,
I’m fine.
My travel anxiety stems from a number of specific factors;
the mode of transport i.e. flying, the fear of forgetting something and
not being prepared (that'll be my control freak tendency), and being
out of reach or family not knowing where I am, just in case there’s an
emergency back home or I end up going missing (that’s my drama queen tendency).
Over the years I have developed coping strategies or ways that can
help minimise the anxiety and nervousness that I experience. Whilst I wish
these would totally eradicate my anxiety (I’m sat here with butterflies in my
stomach subconsciously stressing about the fact that we fly to Japan tomorrow…
I’m writing this post before our trip so that I can schedule it to be published
whilst I’m away), I have come to accept that nothing is ever likely to get rid
of my travel anxiety and all I can do is minimise it and its impact, as best as
I can.
With regards to flying, these days I rarely fly on my own.
As I’m not working, I no longer travel for work, only pleasure… only it’s
hardly ever a pleasurable experience! This usually includes trips home to
England and holidays so most of the time my hubby is with me. Having someone I
know with me on a plane makes a big difference. My hubby is well versed with my
travel anxiety and so does a good job of distracting and reassuring me during
those key times when I’m most freaked out… take-off and landings. Where
possible, I try to take a daytime flight rather than nighttime because that
causes me less stress. Being able to look out of the window and actually see
makes me (psychologically) feel better than seeing nothing but darkness… and we
already know I’m scared of the dark! If I am on a nighttime flight then I try
to distract myself by watching movies and, if possible sleeping. To help me
sleep, I always have calming Zen music on my iphone / ipod. I also take my
travel blanket and neck pillow in order to make myself as comfortable as
possible.
For my control freak tendency and the fear of forgetting something,
I write lists… actually I write categorised lists (you know… vitals (passport, ticket, money, keys), electronics,
clothes, footwear, accessories, toiletries, makeup, medication, jewellery,
gifts and so on)… at least 24hrs before the trip so that way I’m not rushing it and
less likely to forget something. Also, it means I have time to revisit the list
and recall something that I may have missed earlier. Now this may seem a bit
OTT (over the top) but one of my worst fears is being stuck in a country where
I don’t speak the language and realising that I’ve forgotten something as vital
as my medication. Suffering from three chronic illness, two of which can leave
me bed bound, means I’ve become accustomed to writing this all important list
and to be on the safe side, I always carry all my non-liquid meds in my hand
luggage… you know just in case my luggage gets lost.
Finally to deal with the whole being out of reach, going
missing and no-one knowing where to look for me debacle, I make sure that
either my hubby or I have a cell phone between us that works in the country we
are visiting. If this means buying a local SIM card for one of our phones then
that’s what we do. I also compile an Excel spreadsheet that details all of our
flight information (airlines, departure and arrival times and dates, airports
and terminals, seat numbers where possible etc), and the contact details of our
hotels (name, address, telephone number with international dialling code, email
etc) which I send to my brother or parents back in England. This may seem
overly cautious but I got into the habit of doing this for my hubby, including
providing addresses of where my work meetings were, when I used to travel with
work. This way he always knew my whereabouts and work schedule, as often I’d be
travelling alone, and the habit has since stuck. It makes me feel better.
Once in the foreign country, I always carry the card of the hotel
that I am staying at, in case I ever get lost or can’t remember the name / address
of where I’m staying. Also, when I used to travel with work, I used to leave
one of my own business cards and a copy of my itinerary in my hotel room. That
way, if I ever went missing the hotel / police would know which company I worked
for and be able to contact my colleagues and they’d have a rough idea of the
places to look for me as a starting point. I know it sounds very dramatic but
you can never take travel safety too seriously, especially as a lone woman.
So those are just a few of the ways I try and manage my
travel anxiety. I try to avoid resorting to medication as a way of managing my
travel anxiety, but I won’t deny that in the past I may have used one of my
migraine pain relief medications, that tended to have a bit of a relaxing effect
on my body and mind, as a way of making the transatlantic flights to the US a
bit more bearable. Although to be fair, flying over water definitely stresses
me out more than flying over land and so I would typically get a migraine as a
result of my travel anxiety anyway. As my friends used to say, flying business
class was definitely wasted on me as I’d spend the whole time stressing rather
than enjoying the privilege ;o)
Do you suffer from travel anxiety? What steps do you take to
manage the anxiety? Any tips or advice for me?
Love Sheen xxx
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